Murder on The Orient Express: A Game Of Cabin Cluedo
Director Kenneth Branagh transforms
himself into Agatha Christie’s Poirot in this star-studded update of the 1974
adaptation. But this take on the famous Belgian detective looks more like a
mash-up of Guy Ritchie’s swashbuckling Sherlock Holmes and a human Mr Monopoly
than the familiar character. The neat, black Suchet‐stache is replaced with a
lavish greying creation while the characteristic limp is switched for some
serious skill at hand-to-hand combat.
Much like Poirot’s new look, the film is extravagant and ostentatious. Everything is a treat to look at. The costumes
and sets beautifully complement the trail of luxury train-carriages that are The
Express. Taking their places in the dining carriage, and at the cordovan bar,
is a glittering cast of familiar faces: Michelle Pfeiffer as Caroline Hubbard,
Johnny Depp as Ratchett and Judi Dench as Princess Dragomiroff. It’s let down
by what little is shown of the landscape outside of the train itself. The CGI mountainside
is no more convincing than the fake background scenery in Lumet’s 1974 original.
The cinematography inside the
carriage is captivating although it does come off as overdone in parts. In one
scene, Branagh’s camera is suspended above Poirot and train director Bouc. The
camera is intent on leading the eye to a potential clue—Poirot’s suitcase stashed in an overhead compartment—but lingers long after it achieves this,
turning the scene into an overly-long and uncomfortable reverie of meticulously
parted scalps. An overuse
of Dutch-tilts and low-angle shots throughout, usually of Branagh, provide
several views of the actors’ nostrils. Branagh says he wants you “to smell the
steam of the Orient Express” but in 65mm, this is a step too far.
The narrative takes second place
to Branagh’s fancy camera angles. The story seems to serve mostly as a means to
explore Poirot, and perhaps Branagh’s, own amour-propre. Several times Poirot
declares that he is the greatest detective the world has ever known and
proclaims his full name and credentials to the passengers. There’s not much
originality in Branagh’s performance either. Some of his gags are performed in
much the same way as Albert Finney does in the original. Poirot is unexpectedly
woken in the early hours for example and emerges from his covers wearing a
whimsical moustache guard.
The film’s villain, Ratchett, is
persona non grata aboard the Express and attempts to hire Poirot as his
bodyguard by offering him a slice of his cake accompanied by a view down the
barrel of his gun. Unsurprisingly, he doesn’t win over Poirot who declares, “I
bring criminals to justice – I don’t protect them”. Ironically, the reluctant
Poirot becomes drawn in to seek redress for Ratchett's murder later that night.
After speaking privately with each character, he deduces the true identities
and motives of the characters on board before eventually covering for them—an
abrupt turn for a character whose entire life has revolved around the scales of
justice being perfectly balanced.
For the most part, the film
presents as a muddle of drawn-out interviews with the suspects and dull twists
that quickly turn suspense into boredom. It pretty much sticks to the original
in plot and style so the lack of surprises might leave those who remember the 1974
film feeling short-changed. The few tweaks to speak of are only superficial and
for all of Branagh’s fluffing, Poirot comes off exactly as Christie had come to
regard the character in her later years, “bombastic, tiresome and egocentric”.
Synopsis: Famous Belgian
detective Hercule Poirot is offered a seat aboard The Orient Express. Travelling
with him is the sour Princess Dragomiroff accompanied by her maid, Hildegarde
Schmidt, slinky Caroline Hubbard, shifty businessman Samuel Ratchett, and a host of 12 other mysterious characters.
At the start of their journey,
Ratchett reveals to Poirot that his life is in danger after being caught
selling fake art and textiles to the mob. He attempts to hire Poirot as his
bodyguard but after he is unceremoniously refused, Ratchett is murdered in his
cabin. Meanwhile, an avalanche leaves the train snowbound on the Yugoslavian
Mountainside.
With only 16 known passengers
left aboard the Express, everyone becomes a suspect. Poirot is forced to work
out who committed the crime before they reach their final destination. He
quickly deduces that Ratchett is really the wrongly acquitted murderer,
Cassetti, who abducted and killed 3-year-old Daisy Armstrong, heiress and
granddaughter of famed actress, Linda Arden. From there, Poirot uncovers that
all of his fellow passengers had been touched by Daisy’s murder and were
assembled by Hubbard (really Arden) to jointly carry out the killing of
Cassetti.
Poirot is moved by the sincerity
of Arden’s heartbreak at the loss of Daisy and decides to tell the police that
he believes an unknown assailant committed the crime – letting Arden and the
others go free. He disembarks from the train and is quickly called away to
Egypt where a murder has been committed on the Nile.
- S.M.V. (Written 2017)
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